Sometimes

Sometimes you have to be reminded that you are in fact fabulous. My friend Danielle helps me with this on a regular basis. I go through my life just doing what needs to be done for my daughter. I have always viewed that as just doing my job. My job as a mother. I got reminded that not only am I doing my job as a mother I am also doing my job as a father. I’m the only parent Kennady has had her entire life. I have done my best to provide her with everything she needs. I have in a lot of cases had to swallow my pride to do so. It didn’t bother me. I never second guessed myself. I never looked at it as anything other than my parental duty and my love for my child. I’m not anything special. Danielle likes to remind me that not everyone does what I do. That not everyone loves their child to the point of having to swallow their own pride to get things done. Granted I have not done it alone. My family and friends have been there ever step of the way but the bulk of the work I have done. I’m always so busy , so tired or just so in love with being with my baby that don’t take the time to give myself any credit.
I pulled myself out of a deep depression caused by being abandoned during the 22nd week of my pregnancy. Thinking you have a partner in life then having that all vanish with one phone call can throw you into a tailspin.  Hell it can throw you into more than that. After crying in my mother’s lap for awhile I got up and realized I was the only person Kennady had to count on 100% of the time. I got to work. I got to work FOR Kennady. I figured out the world of consignment shops and sales. I didn’t even know there were consignment shops for kids items. I learned fast. I learned how to get 20 outfits for $5. I learned to save money on almost everything. I became the queen of coupons. I started asking companies for discounts and freebies. I put my story out there, people and companies responded in a favorable manner. I have been unbelievably blessed. So many have blessed Kennady solely because I asked them to. I have gotten everything that was on my “dream baby item list”. Not all of it was brand new out of the box but still very lovely nonetheless. The main thing I have been able to give Kennady is love. I have loved her since I found out I was pregnant. She’s my world my everything. I love her more than words could ever explain. I am dedicated to her. To her well being. Until about 28 weeks gestation I didn’t fully understand that not everyone loves and cares about their child(ren). That’s just a foreign concept to me. Danielle tells me that’s part of what makes me fabulous. The simple fact that I love my daughter and would never leave her for any reason. I would die for her.
With all the “things” I’ve done and overcome I still don’t sit around thinking about how truly fabulous I am. Though I have to admit it does feel great  when someone else notices what you’ve done and all your hard work. My daughter is a happy , healthy 10 months old. Ok yeah I’d like to think I have had a lot to do with that.  Parenting isn’t easy , I think we should all pat each other on the back every once in awhile. We have to lift each other up with positivity and love. Thank you Danielle. I love you.

Inza